THE CUP OF JOE

Cher and Cher Alike

2010-06-13T16:57:00.004-05:00

I'm at the local record store a short walk from my house. Everytime I buy something there, the clerk says something about the purchase, and usually it's an esteem boost, a slam dunk, a compliment about my taste in music. Sometimes he says nothing -- let's just call it a knowing glance of approval.

This time, the approval is 2/3 guaranteed, because I have two Bob Dylan CDs to buy, along with ... Cher: The Greatest Hits.

What will the clerk say, I think to myself, as I sift through my potential purchases? As I approach the register I stack the CDs with Dylan on top twice, and then Cher.

He checks out the first CD, looks at me, nods, and approves.

Next Dylan CD: He glances up, eyebrows raise. Approval.

Then he sees Cher's greatest hits. There's a pause.

"Wow, I didn't see that coming," he says.

I pay the bill and slowly leave.

Tony Awards Are Tonight

2010-06-13T16:17:00.000-05:00

Let's. Go. La Cage!

More on that spectacularly entertaining 2010 production sometimesthis week.

Cars Have No Color Anymore Nowadays in Today's Society at the Present Time

2010-06-13T12:25:00.007-05:00

So muted, so dull, so conservative: a blaze of whites, greys and blacks. No pizazz, no punch, where the heart of the matter is just blending in.

I'm talking about car colors. Look at a supermarket parking lot. Drive down the highway. Look outside your window.

I thought about this the other day while watching Bewitched. Look below at that glorious yellow convertible Bonneville that Samantha drives! And look at the other cars behind her, especially that "Hurley-blue" Dharma Initiative baby blue van, and the bell pepper red "Old Thyme" car.

We need more cars like this on the road now. Wouldn't it brighten our outlook?

Our current pallet of drab cars ... what does it say about us? Should we blame the sour economy? 9/11? I'm told by interior designers that "in" colors for housing interiors generally mirror the national mood. Is this what has happened to our cars? Did eight years of George Bush ring all the fun out of us, did the War in Iraq coat us in gloom so much that a colorful car became ... tacky and inappropriate?

I say let's keep hope alive and bring the color on.

Come on, bright orange "Brady Bunch kitchen" Ford Focus! Let's go, Powder Blue Altima! It's time for you, lime-green BMW 7-series!

Let's bring some color back to our cars, OK?

Just Because

2010-04-24T07:08:00.001-05:00

Wow!

2010-04-08T11:30:00.001-05:00

The film below won an Oscar last month. How the producers didn't get sued, I have no clue, but this is a terrific, wonderful, stupendous ... and thought-provoking piece of filmmaking

Logorama from Marc Altshuler - Human Music on Vimeo.

"You Ever See a Grown Man Naked?"

2010-03-14T22:18:00.004-05:00

Loved him in Mission: Impossible. Loved him in Airplane.

Michael Pollak at the New York Times captures the career of Peter Graves nicely in the first 29 words of his obit.

Paula Who?

2010-02-25T06:31:00.005-06:00

I'm not sure I love this season of American Idol, in terms of the contestants. But I do love, love, love, love, love, love Ellen DeGeneres!

My As-of-This-Second 5 Favorite Characters on TV

2010-02-13T08:34:00.010-06:00

1. Gloria from Modern Family. Because she's from COLOOOOOOOMBIA.
2. Barb the Cougar from Cougar Town. How can you not like a horny, sexy, confidant 40-something who seems to have a cccktail surgically attached to her hand?
3. The "new guy" on 30 Rock, Danny, played by Cheyenne Jackson, who gives Neil Patrick Harris a run for his money as America's favorite (openly) gay actor. A great talent.
4. Senor Chang from Community. !El es muy tonto!
5. "Clive Bixby." If you know the reference, you're probably getting an ab workout from laughter right now. I predict that "pulling a Clive Bixby" or "CliveBixbying" will soon enter the urban cultural vernacular in various forms: as a noun, a verb, an adverb and an adjective. Next stop: Webster's.

Just curious

2010-01-30T13:52:00.002-06:00

Do you suppose that it might just be against some state or federal law to use Snuggle in a Downy ball?

If it is, I need to find a good lawyer.

Latest WTF News From the Supreme Court

2010-01-24T18:42:00.008-06:00

Free speech by corporations = same thing as free speech by individuals?

Huh?

Many thoughtful Americans had just one reaction to this ruling:

Whatever Happened to the Real Serpico?

2010-01-24T18:39:00.003-06:00

Find out here.

'Luck Trumps Death'

2010-01-24T18:05:00.004-06:00

On Friday Wally and I watched The Hurt Locker, maybe the greatest movie to date about the War in Iraq and one of my Top 3 movies of 2009.

If you've seen the movie, check out these articles in today's NYT -- here and here - that explore the real life soldiers who work defusing homemade bombs that the military refers to as improvised explosive devices, or I.E.D.'s. Thankfully, this front-page story of a solder who steps on an I.E.D. doesn't end in a bang.

I'm Not Mature

2010-01-22T15:03:00.005-06:00

So just now I'm reading one of my favorite blogs, Andy Towle's Towleroad, and I see this ad interspersed in the copy:

Since when does "38" qualify as "mature"?

I'm the same age as Andy, 42, and although I'll gladly accept the term "middle age," I am most certainly not "mature."

In more ways than one.

That said, I hope Eric, 38, and Robert, 41, eventually find the maturity they require, even if that means dating a senior citizen in his late 40s.

I Would Like to Hear His Own Faux Conservative Outrage If This Involved Somebody Else

2010-01-22T12:54:00.003-06:00

Shameful.

I'd Be Laughing If I Weren't Crying

2010-01-22T09:28:00.002-06:00

Johnny Spreads His Seeds, Doesn't Feel So Pretty, Gets 'Hands Dirty' With Photo Op

2010-01-22T08:51:00.013-06:00

Yesterday, two years late, John Edwards admitted to fathering a child out of wedlock. I heard it on the CBS radio network news on the drive home from work.

The reporter played a quote from his wife, who said she is supportive. The story ended by mentioning that John Edwards was doing relief work in Haiti, and that Mrs. Edwards found out about his whereabouts ... from the reporter. Classy.

Remember the hair incident with Edwards? It was a YouTube video of Edwards grooming, in a way-too-admiring and "primping" way, with "I Feel Pretty" as the background music. And remember the "he's building a 28,000-square-foot house he says is carbon-neutral while portraying himself as an environmentalist" stories?

I'd say that both stories were blown way out of proportion at the time, in a Howard "he really didn't scream" Dean kind of way. Media focused on the hair and the house obsessively. The world has bigger issues, which the media were all-too-happy to not mention thousands of times, unlike all the harping about primping and Edwards' version of Monticello/Mt. Vernon/The Hermitage.

But, looking back, I'd say both were "windows into the soul" moments. Both betrayed a narcissistic streak in Edwards that made him all-too-capable of cheating on his cancer-stricken wife, lying about his out-of-wedlock daughter and coming to the conclusion that no other American would make a better leader for the free world.

The Invincible Mr. Edwards would have made him a terrible president. Next.

Just Because

2010-01-18T20:15:00.001-06:00

Marty Gracias

2010-01-18T11:15:00.000-06:00

Martin Scorcese won a special award at last night's Golden Globes.

Here's the trailer for one of my "top three favorite" Scorcese films, "The King of Comedy."

Not Funny: Part I

2010-01-12T18:18:00.005-06:00

NOT FUNNY: Part II

2010-01-12T18:14:00.002-06:00

Not Funny: Part III

2010-01-12T18:09:00.007-06:00

The mentally "questionable" contestants who will inevitably appear on tonight's premiere of American Idol, who are oblivious to their lack of talent, who will be edited to look as foolish as possible, and all in the name of ratings. I'm not talking about the obvious posers and fakers, those seeking 15 minutes, but those people who are sincere, hopeful, talentless and clueless -- presented, cruelly, for ridicule and ratings.

Facebook Status Updates I'd Like to See (But Probably Won't)

2010-01-11T05:41:00.002-06:00

INSERT NAME HERE has explosive diarrhea.

INSERT NAME HERE is pleasuring himself.

INSERT NAME HERE is pleasuring herself.

INSERT NAME HERE is taking the Activia 14-day Challenge.

INSERT NAME HERE is using too many exclamation points!!!!

INSERT NAME HERE became a fan of rectal thermometers.

INSERT NAME HERE has her panties in a bunch.

INSERT NAME HERE has his panties in a bunch.

INSERT NAME HERE became a fan of Incomplete Sentences.

INSERT NAME HERE became a fan of Becoming a Fan of Things.

INSERT NAME HERE can't spell, punctuate or communicate.

They're Just Simple Cavemen!

2010-01-10T10:42:00.012-06:00

From this morning's New York Times: Meet some "meat eaters," a subculture in New York of men (and women) who just want to be a simple cavemen.

The caveman lifestyle, in Mr. Durant’s interpretation, involves eating large quantities of meat and then fasting between meals to approximate the lean times that his distant ancestors faced between hunts. Vegetables and fruit are fine, but he avoids foods like bread that were unavailable before the invention of agriculture. Mr. Durant believes the human body evolved for a hunter-gatherer lifestyle, and his goal is to wean himself off what he sees as many millenniums of bad habits.
These urban cavemen also choose exercise routines focused on sprinting and jumping, to replicate how a prehistoric person might have fled from a mastodon.

Keyrock (and his BMW) would be proud!

One more thing: Who doesn't miss the wonderful Phil Hartman?

Miscellaneous Facebook Ruminations

2010-01-09T10:24:00.007-06:00

Are people with more than one ga-zillion Facebook friends really popular or really superficial?

I didn't like you in high school. Why would I want to be your Facebook friend now?

Farm World. I hope there's a level where at some point players, somehow, and in some way, are able to "get a life."

Meow!

Gotta run, cuz I got something cookin' in Cafe World (limited menu: toast and bacon) and I'm eligible for a Farkle bonus game in exactly 37 minutes.

Like Something from a Bad Gilligan's Island Episode?

2010-01-05T19:45:00.007-06:00

I just remembered my blogger username and login after 10 months of amnesia (or was that apathy?). It was jarred back into my conscious mind just moments ago, when I heard Glenn Beck say something stupid.

But is anybody there? Does anybody care?

Failure is Not Just an Option; It Makes You Bonus Eligible

2009-03-16T06:19:00.008-05:00

Over the weekend we learned that 400 AIG executives, who judging from the way their firm has been run could possibly be considered utter failures, will be getting $160 million in bonuses.

This follows the $170 billion in taxpayer bailout money they had received on four different occasions in light of its status as "too big to fail." Ben Bernanke said last night on 60 Minutes that nothing, nothing has pissed him off more.

Below is my post on AIG from last September in which I shared some information the CEO had shared with shareholders in the company's most recent annual report.

It still pisses me off, and read closely the item at the bottom that is labeled, of all things, "Integrity."

***

"Sincerely, Martin J. Sullivan"

In the last year AIG stock traded for as high as $70 a share. It's trading as of right now at $2.99 -- about the price for a gallon of milk.

Last week the stock was trading at a low of $1.25 a share, or about the price (sale price, I should say) of a can of Progresso Rich & Hearty Chicken Pot Pie soup.

So, in advance of this collapse, what were its investors told? I pulled the below from the AIG annual report, which you can read here. We'll just let these words speak for themselves, with no further comment.

One more thing: Forbes listed Sullivan's CEO compensation at $11 million. And when he left the firm earlier this summer, he was reportedly paid out a $47 million severance package. No doubt about it: One could buy quite a lot of Progresso Rich & Hearty Chicken Pot Pie soup (and deflated AIG stock) with that sort of coin.

Heckuva job, Marty.

Pressing Questions

2009-02-26T19:52:00.003-06:00

With a whopping one post in all of 2009, is The Cup of Joe yet another victim of the floundering economy?

Should The Cup of Joe shut down permanently?

Has TCOJ been sent to Exile Island, and, if so, will he find the hidden immunity idol?

Or has TCOJ been caught in some sort of LOST-esque time warp where blogs are frowned upon by The Authorities?

Or, maybe, Joe is writing a secret blog he just hasn't told anybody about?

***

Although nobody is probably still reading here .... stay tuned for answers.

Sometimes, however, the only true answer is silence.

I Hope He Apologizes

2009-01-12T19:24:00.001-06:00

Link.

Studies in Idiocy; Questions of the Day

2008-12-09T18:52:00.004-06:00

I wonder who is going to play Rod Blagojevich on Saturday Night Live?

What an idiot, eh? Here's the Department of Justice press release.

MSNBC, by the way, cut away from the fascinating DOJ press conference, featuring a couple completely quotable prosecutors, to go live to an NBC press conference featuring the big Jay Leno announcement, which already had been all over the front page of today's New York Times and other outlets many hours earlier.

Kind of idiotic, eh?

In 50 Days ...

2008-12-01T18:41:00.001-06:00

The worst president in U.S. history is headed to retirement.

And not a day too soon.

And what a mess he's made, no?

"Love for All"

2008-11-25T18:38:00.001-06:00

One more reason to love him: Bjorn Borg launches a dating site with the below commercial. Love for all, indeed!

It's Real!

2008-11-24T18:14:00.001-06:00

This is not a joke. I don't think.

A Worthy Read

2008-11-11T13:35:00.002-06:00

A friend sent me this. It's about a butler worthy of hugs from a First Lady and state dinner invitations from the President. It's the best thing I've read all week, a touching and human story about race, and progress, and presidents.

'This is About the Human Heart'

2008-11-11T06:33:00.003-06:00

A dose of history and common sense from Keith Olbermann about gay marriage. Bravo.

Mr. President-Elect, and Grandpa

2008-11-11T05:55:00.003-06:00

The kid with the threatening stick in the back, like so many others, is on the wrong side of history. No you can't, little boy.

But yes we can!

Not Entirely Red

2008-11-09T15:47:00.002-06:00

Obams has won 20 percent of Nebraska's electoral votes. More here.

That gives Obama 365 electoral votes. The most ever won by W was 286, who also won 271 Supreme-Court-aided votes in 2000.

Hetero Divorce: Still Legal

2008-11-06T13:10:00.005-06:00

The people of California denied Ellen her marriage rights on Tuesday.

Apparently a loving lesbian couple presents a threat to traditional marriage, according to the will of a majority of voters.

Assholes.

Where's the proposition banning heterosexual divorce?

UPDATE: Good news for Ellen and 17,999 others.

The First Family-Elect

2008-11-06T06:51:00.004-06:00

Totally, totally adorable.

And we totally, totally forgive Michelle for that dress.

Keep hope alive, mis amigos.

(Photo source.)

Four Words: "President-Elect Barack Obama"

2008-11-04T22:10:00.002-06:00

Three more: "God Bless America"

Ignore my last post: The big winner tonight is the promise of America.

The Big Winner on Tuesday Will Be ...

2008-11-02T15:44:00.006-06:00

Sarah Palin.

No. I don't think she'll win the election; in fact, I think she is costing John McCain votes. A lot of them.

Nor do I think she is necessarily eyeing a run for president in 2012. This probably isn't her first option, nor her best.

I think she's looking to cash in.

I expect that sometime in the next four years she will pursue or be presented with a syndicated talk show opportunity, on radio or TV. Think of her as a female Rush Limbaugh, an Oprah for conservatives. (Limbaugh made a reported $33 million last year.) Sure, a lot of people hate her, including a segment of moderate Republicans. But a niche of people absolutely love her.

She'll make millions.

She could even replace Elisabeth Hasslebeck on The View, or join Elisabeth on some new syndicated show for conservative soccer moms and Jane the Plumber.

On Tuesday, Barack Obama will become the next president of the United States, inheriting all the messes from Bush the Lesser. What he faces won't be easy.

But Sarah Palin? Sometime in the next four years, if she chooses this path, she'll be a filthy rich celebrity.

POW Fashion

2008-10-29T05:20:00.000-05:00

I recently had the opportunity to watch Hogan's Heroes in high-def on HD Net for the first time.

Don't Hogan's Nazi-supplied pajamas look comfortable?

Separated at Birth?

2008-10-26T10:20:00.003-05:00

Election 2008: When Dirty Tricks met Mr. Clean.

I Am Not Joe the Plumber

2008-10-25T06:47:00.006-05:00

Twenty years ago this week: It was a crisp fall day and, as an idealistic (or possibly just drunk) college student, I walked house-to-house canvassing for Michael Dukakis and Lloyd Bentsen along with some of my college Democrat friends.

A recent John McCain TV spot took me back to these times because the ad made me think of a Dukakis commercial from way back when. The Dukakis commercial, embedded below, is esoteric. It pictures politicians in a smoke-filled room talking about Dan Quayle. Just terrible. This didn't resonate with anyone.

I thought of this terrible Dukakis ad this week when McCain came out with the below ad. This, too, is esoteric, and won't change anyone's mind, and might also just confuse people. It's lame. It's all about Joe the Plumber, the Hero McCain is still harping on even though "Sam the Plumber" hasn't exactly passed the scratch-and-sniff bullshit detector tests with flying colors.

I'd also like to say, just for the record, that unlike the people in this video, I am NOT Joe the plumber. I owe no back taxes, I'm not a Republican plant, my taxes would go down under Barack Obama, I would not enjoy being a media whore, and my real first name is Joe.

Two Statements of Fact, and One Statement of Opinion

2008-10-24T21:20:00.003-05:00

1. Linda Lavin from Alice turned 71 this month.

2. Linda Lavin is a year younger than John McCain.

3. John McCain reminds me of Mel.

'The Best Advice I Ever Got'

2008-10-24T20:59:00.015-05:00

A couple weeks ago, on the day the stock market fell 777 points to what was then the LOWEST LEVELS EVER, a copy of the new issue of Fortune Magazine arrived on my desk. A major business leader was featured giving readers "The Best Advice I Ever Got." It's a regular feature.

Here's what she had to say. (Click to embiggen.)

Although I admire this spirit of optimism, it's also the same spirit that has me regretting that I didn't switch all the money in my 401K plan from stocks into something more stable, say a tangible physical commodity. Like Kitty Litter, dirty diapers or recycled animal feces "repurposed" as fertilizer.

***

This week the stock market again reached the LOWEST LEVELS EVER.

It's a reminder for people like our Fortune Friend pictured above that fearlessness sometimes leads to recklessness, and then we all lose.

Failure is an option, my friends. This is why we need to keep hope alive.

Deja Vu All Over Again

2008-10-24T15:25:00.002-05:00

THIS happened to me this morning. Again.

Barack Obama: Reducing road rage and blood pressure all across America.

The Last Word: Kirk's Phaser is NOT on Stun

2008-10-21T17:42:00.003-05:00

Below is a textbook case of a celebrity having to have The Last Word.

Really, who cares?

This Makes Me ... Sad

2008-10-10T21:15:00.004-05:00

Sad for McCain. One reaps what one sows.

Sad for the woman who said this. Don't most of us have an ignorant relative or acquaintance (or maybe even friend) who would say the same thing? Can she help it if she gets all her news from Fox and believes everything read from a teleprompter and insinuated during a Sarah Palin stump speech?

Sad.

Two Things That Leave Me Speechless

2008-10-10T05:12:00.005-05:00

... But for different reasons.

1) Don't watch the first video on a full stomach.

2) Watch the second video if you're still feeling sick from the first video and need some reassurance about the promise and hope of America.

'Mosquitos v. Mountains': Not a Supreme Court Decision

2008-10-07T07:29:00.003-05:00

... But it was part of an answer during the evening gown portion of Sarah Palin's Miss Alaska appearance.

Ya Know, Marge, Roger Ebert is One Smart Cookie

2008-10-04T11:07:00.006-05:00

Roger Ebert is one terrific writer. I've long admired his reviews, which I'd call "essays" rather than reviews since they're so much more insightful than your typical movie criticism.

Check out his non-political V.P debate analysis here. He works in some Fargo references that are just golden as he ponders whether Sarah Palin is more like police officer Marge Gunderson or car salesman Jerry Lundegaard.

Sarah Palin: 18,000 Tiny Cracks in her Credibility

2008-10-03T06:50:00.007-05:00

Rudolph Guiliani just declared on MSNBC that Sarah Palin last night gave one of the best debate performances in U.S. history.

Perhaps he is hopped up on goofballs.

***

Two quick reactions about her debate performance:

* She ripped the mainstream media in her closing remarks, but it should be pointed out that it wasn't the mainstream media who gave incoherent answers during the Katie Couric interviews, it was she herself. And she still hasn't had a press conference, because she knows it will expose her serious lack of depth.

* Her answer about expanding the powers of the vice presidency "with a bit more authority" based on the constition was baffling, incoherent and a little scary.

"I'm thankful the Constitution would allow a bit more authority given to the vice president also if that vice president so chose to exert it in working with the Senate and making sure that we are supportive of the president's policies and making sure too that our president understands what our strengths are."

That's an exact quote. Decoder wheel not included.

Why We Need to Be Careful About Sarah Palin

2008-10-02T12:39:00.002-05:00

Liberal blogs and mainstream publications such as the Wall Street Journal are reporting rumors about Sarah Palin's DISASTROUS performances in pre-debate simulations. Keith Olberman gleefully reports these rumors. Expectations are at an all-time low.

Be very careful, people.

Expectations are now so low that if she is "mediocre" or "mediocre to bad" instead of just "bad," the pundits will declare her the winner.

This is exactly what the McCain camp wants: lowever expectations.

So be very careful people. I have no doubt, in the format of this particular debate, in Palin's ability to 1) recite lines 2) inspire populist glee among a certain segment of fundamentalists and 3) look sexy.

She did it during the interview portion of the Miss Alaska competition, and she can do so, perhaps even skillfully, here as well.

Five Questions for Sarah Palin

2008-10-02T02:32:00.005-05:00

1. Please explain the significance of Marbury v. Madison in American judicial history.

2. Compare and contrast lip stick with lip gloss.

3. If you had to choose between terrific smelling hair and hair that had the type of volume that would be the envy of the entire Wasilla City Council, which would you choose?

4. Among the following three choices, separate the sit-com from the infamous Supreme Court decisions: Plessy v. Ferguson. Bush v. Gore. Golden Girls.

5. Which Golden Girl do you think most resembles John McCain?

Let the Debate Begin

2008-10-02T02:11:00.004-05:00

But don't underestimate Sarah Palin, cause I know she has some tricks up her sleeve for tonight's debate, like:

* Vasoline on the teeth is a terrific way to make the smile brighter.
* Lightly heating the eyelash curler with a hair dryer is a great way to make the eyelash curl last!
* Lipstick, lipstick, lipstick.

Just Pointing Out the Finger-Pointer

2008-09-29T18:30:00.007-05:00

The below quote, emailed by a reader, is from an AP story on the economic bailout failure. "It just drives home the differing STRATEEGERIES of the two candidates," the reader wrote.

Within an hour of the House defeating the bill, Obama sought to calm fears by saying: "I'm confident we're going to get there, but it's going to be rocky." McCain issued a statement from senior policy adviser Doug Holtz-Eakin that blamed Obama and Democrats for the legislation's failure — even though more Republicans than Democrats voted against it.

I dunno about you, but I think you take the measure of a man not during good times but during terrible times. This is when people show you who they truly are. Would you want to work for someone who pointed fingers during a time of crisis rather than focusing on the immediate issue at hand? (I've been around people like this before, and it's dreadful, and these people are usually the biggest bonehead in any organization.)

And would you want such a person to lead the free world?

"Sincerely, Martin J. Sullivan"

2008-09-25T14:43:00.004-05:00

In the last year AIG stock traded for as high as $70 a share. It's trading as of right now at $2.99 -- about the price for a gallon of milk.

Last week the stock was trading at a low of $1.25 a share, or about the price (sale price, I should say) of a can of Progresso Rich & Hearty Chicken Pot Pie soup.

So, in advance of this collapse, what were its investors told? I pulled the below from the AIG annual report, which you can read here. We'll just let these words speak for themselves, with no further comment.

One more thing: Forbes listed Sullivan's CEO compensation at $11 million. And when he left the firm earlier this summer, he was reportedly paid out a $47 million severance package. No doubt about it: One could buy quite a lot of Progresso Rich & Hearty Chicken Pot Pie soup (and deflated AIG stock) with that sort of coin.

Heckuva job, Marty.

McCain-Palin

2008-09-24T18:06:00.013-05:00

Let's review:

1) John McCain suspends his campaign and now doesn't want to debate Obama on Friday and he draws the ire of David Letterman for canceling an appearance and then shows up at the CBS studios for a campaign interview (for the campaign he had just suspended) with Katie Couric instead.
2) The news comes just as Obama surges in the polls and Sarah Palin underwhelms during another Couric interview around the same time as the Palin "protection from witchcraft" Prayer Video surfaces. Meanwhile, bloggers like Andrew Sullivan continue to outshine mainstream media journalists like Couric by exposing serious misgivings regarding Palin's ability to tell the truth.
3) While this is happening, the National Enquirer reports about Palin's alleged marital infidelities (I personally don't give a boo about her personal life, though it would make her a complete hypocrite), and the McCain camp reportedly has suggested that the VP debate next Tuesday be canceled so he and Obama can debate Tuesday in St. Louis rather than Friday in Mississippi, as if four days' difference will give him (one of 100 U.S. Senators) the time to make the economy all better? It definitely does give him four more days to prepare, and Palin lord-knows-how-many-more days to prepare for the, ahem, "rescheduled" debate, if indeed it ever happens.

It makes one wonder.

Someone needs to ferret out some honest truth here. Where's Kitty Carlisle when you need her? Dancing and singing in heaven, I bet, where it no longer matters that her stock portfolio has hit the shitter and a former beauty queen from Alaska with a penchant for mistruths is the potential president-in-waiting behind a 72-year-old two-time melanoma survivor.

A Peek into the Crystal Ball: Five Potential Sarah Palin Moments

2008-09-22T17:57:00.008-05:00

I'm not saying any single one of these things will happen ... these are merely five potential and unconnected future events, big and small alike, that I could imagine happening. You can let me know in the comments which scenario is most likely.

1. December 2010: Palin wins Dancing with the Stars

2. March 2017: VH-1 "I Love 2008" special premieres. Palin gets 30-second segment featuring jokes from several comedians I've never heard of, sandwiched between longer segments on Mad Men and Gossip Girl.

3. September 2013: A triumphant Vice President Sarah Palin cuts ribbon to officially open the Bridge to Nowhere and uses the occasion as a call to arms against the excesses of Big Government.

4. July 2009: Palin lands job as host of Trading Spaces, wins Mrs. America contest and unveils her new line of designer lipstick.

5. January 2021: Not having appeared to have aged a single day in the 11 years, 11 months and 4 days she has served as president, President Sarah Palin completes her second full term after having had succeeded the late President John McCain, whose tragic death involving a team of Alaskan sled dogs is still a frequent source of investigative reports and internet blog rumors, despite all assurances to the contrary based on the comprehensive 850-page Palin Report led by Secretary of State Todd Palin.

2008 Emmy Awards: A Pictorial Review

2008-09-21T20:14:00.002-05:00

Socialized Capitalism

2008-09-21T19:00:00.006-05:00

Watch this vintage Ronald Reagan diatribe against "big government" and Socialized Medicine.

And then think about the $700+ billion bail-out of greedy corporate fat-cats in the financial sector who will be gorging at the public trough because of their alarmingly poor judgment. Socialized Capitalism. Oy.

And it's probably the right thing to do. Oy.

***

A philosophy that welcomes government largess only for the rich and the powerful and corporations is ... shameful. And it runs counter to everything that conservatism should be.

We could have had national health care for all Americans, like Harry Truman wanted more than half a century ago, for much, much cheaper. Republicans have always opposed it. "There you go again," Reagan told Jimmy Carter in 1980. Oy.

A government that is paying billions a month for an unjust war sold under false pretenses also should run counter to true conservatism as well. The amount of money we've spent in Iraq would have paid for a very sensible and comprehensive national health care plan for all Americans.

Socialized Capitalism and billions of taxpayer money wasted on boondoggle projects appear to be the legacy of eight years of "conservative" rule? If Democrat Warren Buffet saw this coming, how come the Republican administration didn't?

Oy.

My Take: Some Election What-Ifs

2008-09-19T05:53:00.005-05:00

I. Could Barack Obama lose Florida and Ohio and still win the election?

Yes. I think it's very possible. See scenario below. (As always, click to embiggen the map.)

This puts Obama with 274 electoral votes, four more than needed for victory. This is good news, I think, for those of us with legitimate worries regarding both these states. Recall the Florida shenanigans of 2000 (which cost Gore the election) and the Ohio shenanigans of 2004 (which probably cost John Kerry the election). Hours-long voting lines ... uncounted ballots ... malfunctioning voting machines ... improper purging of voters lists. Fie on election officials in both these states! And in a razor-thin election, like both 2000 and 2004, these things are unconscionable.

II. Could Barack Obama lose the electoral vote count and still win the election?

Yes. See below scenario in which McCain gets 267 (to Obama's 264) but doesn't reach the 270 electoral votes to win.

What happens then? The race is kicked to the U.S. House of Representaives, where Democrats should still have the majority. Result: President Barack Obama. (Fun Fact: If you read The Federalist papers, you'll discover that the Founding Fathers pretty much assumed that no candidate would ever win the election in the electoral college and that all presidential elections would normally be decided in the house. What they didn't see coming was the emergence and dominance of American political parties, which they called "factions." The Founders hated "factions."

III. Will this be a close election?

Despite the scary "McCain is leading" poll numbers in recent weeks, I still think if Obama wins, he wins in a landslide, with Bill Clinton-like electoral numbers, as pictured in the below map, wihch is my official PREDICTION MAP. (http://www.electoral-vote.com/ still has Obama losing the electoral college as of today, based on polling.)

And if McCain or Palin really mess up in a debate or two, and if John McCain still keeps acting like this, and Palin keeps making "window into her soul" gaffes like this, then Missouri and North Carolina and Indiana might turn, too.

Keep hope alive, mis amigos.

(Maps generated using the dailykos.com map generator.)

Coming Tomorrow!

2008-09-18T18:11:00.003-05:00

Election Maps. And an election prediction. I think the post, which I've already written, has something to do with the 47 cups of coffee I've had since 5:30 this morning.

Now, it's time for No. 48.

Keep hope alive.

George Bush In Perspective: Part I

2008-09-18T12:10:00.004-05:00

Remember when George Bush wanted to privatize social security? You know, put it in the market. As in the stock market. You know, the market that has rapidly been destroying American wealth all week?

Thank God that never happened.

Remember, too, when George Bush ran for president in 2000 as a "compassionate conservative" who would be a careful, prudent steward of the econony who would not balloon the deficit and who promised a "humble" foreign policy.

No need to thank God, cuz that never happened.

George Bush in Perspective: Part II

2008-09-18T12:00:00.001-05:00

The Dow Jones Industrial Average on Bill Clinton's last day in office: 10587

Stock market low today as of 30 seconds ago: 10459

Are you better off than you were 8 years ago? My mutual funds aren't.

Mean Girls

2008-09-17T17:53:00.006-05:00

For your consideration, here are two quotes of the day.

I. "'Sarah Barracuda' -- she's proud of that name now, she uses it in her campaigns," said her former mentor. "But she got that name from the way she conducted herself with her own teammates. She was vicious to the other girls, always playing up to the coach and pointing out when the other girls made mistakes. She was the coach's favorite and he gave her more playing time than her skills warranted. My niece was on her team; she was a very good player. I used to sit there in the stands, and I would wonder, Why on earth is Sarah getting so much playing time?" Source: Salon.com

II. “She’s a child, inexperienced and simplistic,” she [R. D. Levno, a retired school principal] said of Sarah. “It’s taking us back to junior high school. She’s one of the popular girls, but one of the mean girls. She is seductive, but she is invented.” Source: Maureen Dowd writing in today's New York Times.

A Tale of Two Ads

2008-09-16T18:24:00.010-05:00

Below is one of Barack Obama's new attack ads. Some of the liberal blogosphere say it's his harshest ad so far. These bloggers are happy to see this new toughness. I say he has to do better.

It's a good ad, but just exactly who does it win over? It gets people who already support him, like me, to nod their heads. Other than this group, this isn't exactly a water cooler discussion starter. Believe it or not, but that blue collar guy who could put Obama over the top in Virginia doesn't care what Time magazine or any of the other media outlets quoted in the ad think.

Below is an ad from moveon.org. I believe it is that organization's first attack, and I think it's better than the Obama ad.

What's the difference between the two ads? The first ad is more targeted to the head and rational thought processes, and the second ad is targeted to the gut and the heart.

Obama doesn't need to win over thoughtful and rational people -- these well-meaning people (on both sides, by the way) already know who they're voting for. And such an appeal to the intellect didn't do John Kerry, Al Gore or Michael Dukakis much good.

He needs to win over people's passions, touch their hearts, make them laugh, make them mad. He needs to give them something they'll talk about at work the next day or at the family dinner table that night. Has anybody seen this ad so far in the election cycle? I haven't. And if Obama can come up with *that* message, he'll win.

This campaign will be won if Obama is passionate, not if he's dispassionate and professorial.

His passion will win him the election, and his dispassion will make him the president that America deserves.

***

(Coming later this week: I'll flesh out my earlier passing thoughts on why I think Obama will lose the election if it's close, but if he wins, he'll win big. I still feel this way. More later.)

"Experience 101"

2008-09-13T09:35:00.006-05:00

Dick Cavett posted this gem today on the New York Times website. Recommended for lovers of language, rationality and parenthetical asides.

Not recommended for those who are awaiting the rapture.

They Weren't Acting Like the Press ... They Were Setting an Example for the Press

2008-09-13T05:57:00.007-05:00

The women of the view -- Elisabeth, too -- just showed the Fourth Estate a thing or too.

At the beginning of the show, Barbera Walters said that John McCain had promised that Sarah Palin will go on The View before the election is over to discuss the issues.

I bet she doesn't.

A Freshman Essay

2008-09-10T18:00:00.003-05:00

"What's the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? Lipstick."

-- Sarah Palin, during her GOP convention acceptance speech, borrowing from the old misogynist joke, "What's the difference between a woman with PMS and a pit bull."

***

So what is the difference between Sarah Palin and a pit bull? This is a fair question, and I'd like to tackle the answer as if I were a freshman in high school. A freshman assigned, in his first-semester composition class, to argue the thesis that "Sarah Palin and pit bulls are very different." Here goes:

START OF FRESHMAN ESSAY

Sarah Palin and pit bulls are very different. For example, Sarah Palin wears lipstick, whereas pit bulls, who do not have the requisite oppossable thumbs that would enable them to apply lipstick, do not and cannot wear lipstick.

The differences do not stop here:

Pit bulls don't wear up-'dos and glasses, and don't look like sexy librarians. In fact, pit bulls usually are barred from public libraries and have neither the authority nor the moxie to threaten to fire librarians who refuse to censor books, unlike Sarah Palin.

Pit bulls generally aren't theocrats, as well, and pit bulls do not belong to churches that await the rapture. Pit bulls also are generally against Alaskan secession, according to most reputed published sources, including Wikipedia. Moreover, a pit bull has never been selected as a vice presidential candidate by a major American political party, unlike Sarah Palin, and a pit bull has never been second in the line of succession to the most powerful and demanding job in the world.

Pit bulls also don't have the capacity for speech and human forms of communication, unlike Sarah Palin, who is quite adroit at reading campaign speeches from a teleprompter.

In summary, there are many differences between Sarah Palin and pit bulls. Moreover, whereas an angry pit bull can inspire fear, trepidation and worry in all humans, an angry Sarah Palin only inspires fear, trepidation and worry in liberals, most moderates, Democrats, people with Ph.Ds, people who fear Alaskan secession and John McCain's dermatologist.

Attention Theocrats! Violating Ninth Commandment is a ... Bridge to Nowhere

2008-09-09T18:59:00.007-05:00

The ninth Commandment: Thou shall not bear false witness ...

I said, thou shall not bear false witness.

John McCain gets BarackRoll'd

2008-09-07T14:39:00.002-05:00

John McCain spoke in front of a green screen when giving his convention speech. So get ready for a bunch of these! Stephen Colbert already had some fun with the same video last week, when he showed McCain speaking in front of a dead guy in a crypt.

Brilliant and Asisine. Still. A Quick Review of Palin's Speech

2008-09-03T22:11:00.014-05:00

Well-written speech. Really. Well-done. A lot of it was complete bullshit, and she didn't mention Bush once, and she mocked Barack Obama's past as a community organizer (how awful), and she continues to mislead on issues such as her "opposition" to pork and the Bridge to Nowhere, but it was delivered well and the person who wrote it did what he needed to do.

But I'm sticking by what I wrote BEFORE all the negative publicity started hitting, about her daughter's pregnancy, about Troopergate, about Alaskan secession, about her Church attendance, about all that.

Small-town America and many others will love her speech. Really. Her Alaskan accent ... her adorable family ... the way she bites down and scrunches her face when she wants to make a tough point. Brilliant.

But could she really be president of the United States? Does she really think, as she stated last night and which has become a Republican talking point, that she has more experience to be president than Joe Biden or Barack Obama? Can she really be a reformer/outsider when the party with her harsh conservative philosophy/worldview has held both the Presidency and Congress for most of the last eight years? Asinine.

Brilliant and Asinine.

$50 Million ... 60 Pennies

2008-09-03T21:16:00.006-05:00

Rudolph Guiliani, the conservative who spent $50 million to win exactly one delegate before withdrawing from the Presidential race, is throwing red meat to the Republican masses tonight in St. Paul.

I saw most of the speech; in fact, it is continuing as I write this. I'm also spending this time browsing my Rudolph Guiliani "Countdown to Victory" 16-Month 2007-2009 calendar, which I bought for 60 pennies on clearance at Borders earlier this year.

In a post by Andrew Sullivan on the speech, titled "One Very Off Moment," he writes:

The one moment that stays with me tonight, oddly enough, was not Palin's speech. It was a line from Giuliani, a New York mayor with a young second third wife and gay friends, mocking a "cosmopolitan" who was brought up by a single mother. It was that Barack Obama's rise could "only happen in America." And it was designed to mock him, the first African-American candidate for the presidency of the United States.

I won't forget that.

Klassy. With a K.

2008-09-03T06:01:00.007-05:00

"I don't understand why it is that all of a sudden you can't tell the truth about Barack Obama because some people are getting rained on."
-- An unnamed Republican, complaining about the abbreviated convention schedule on Monday because of fears about Hurricane Gustav.

The Daily Show audience jeered.

Republican Men Who Have Sex With Men But Who Are Not Gay (the RMSMBWANGs)

2008-09-02T20:06:00.008-05:00

Here's wishing all those closeted gay Republicans lots of hot "I'm not gay" gay sex during the Republican convention. You know, the RMSMBWANGs (pronouced Rims-Bwangs).

If the ads on the gay sex web sites are any indication, then it looks like they'll be paying for lots of illegal, hot gay sex. Even though they're not gay. Even though they want to limit the rights for those men who have the audacity to both have sex with men and admit that they are gay, too.

***

You know that nobody would be making an issue of this if they didn't make an issue of US first.

***

Speaking of Republicans who hate gays, here's a list of Sarah Palin's gay-hatin' ways. I wish people would leave her daughter alone, but as U.S. Rep. Barney Frank points out, they're the ones who keep harping on family values. So when people "bring it on," why are they so shocked and offended?

For the Indepedent, Can't-Make-Up-His Mind Voter

2008-09-01T20:24:00.003-05:00

Asinine and Brilliant

2008-08-30T10:11:00.017-05:00

John McCain's pick of Sarah Palin as his running mate is brilliant and asinine.

She is beautiful, well-spoken and likeable. She has a certain "it" factor that also could be said of Obama. She is unvetted. She is deeply conservative. She has a 4-month-old son with autism. She supported Pat Buchanan in the 2000 presidential election. She said recently she doesn't know much about the Iraq War and that she wasn't sure just what the Vice President does. She is the personification of "change" and is the consumate "Washington outsider" -- two desirable qualities after eight years of Bush. She's a former union member. She hunts. She looks like Tina Fey.

It'd be foolish to underestimate Palin. In the absence of some revelation or other scandal, she is not Dan Quayle and she is not Geraldine Ferraro. Quayle came off like a deer in the headlights during his vice presidential debate with Lloyd Bentsen. My gut feel is that this former beauty queen is more fox than deer -- and not because of the way she looks.

***

Choosing Palin was a liberal, bold gamble made by a conservative. Chosing Biden was a conservative, prudent pick made by a liberal.

McCain's pick was a Hail Mary pass to help him win an election -- more than it was to help him govern. Obama's pick was a run up the middle on first down (five-yard gain) to help him govern -- more than it was to help him win an election. Wouldn't a true conservative prefer the Obama methodology? Is now a good time to gamble as Americans are dying in the Middle East and as our economy tanks?

This will either help McCain win, just barely, or it'll help Obama win in a landslide. I don't think Obama wins a close election. He'll either win big, or he won't win at all.

***

John McCain, who has battled the deadliest form of skin cancer on multiple occasions, turned 72 on Friday. Sarah Palin would be one heartbeat away from the most powerful job in a dangerous world.

If that doesn't make your heart race, what would? On this level, this bold, liberal, non-traditional choice is reckless and asinine.

Obama's Speech. In Three Words

2008-08-28T22:05:00.002-05:00

He looked presidential.

Obama's VP Pick

2008-08-23T08:05:00.004-05:00

Has a cool first name.

If Al Gore had picked This Joe instead of Other Joe in 2000, he'd be winding down his second term right about now. You need a V.P. who can respond sharply and quickly to attacks and go on the attack -- something that "Gentleman Joe" (more recently recognizable in recent years as Cuckoo Joe) did a poor and absolutely inadequate job of in 2000.

Go, go, go Joseph.

Spaghetti Cat

2008-08-21T07:04:00.000-05:00

Why would anybody need a reason why?

You Have Yourself to Blame, Jack

2008-08-19T19:24:00.003-05:00

"George Bush's record as a student, military man, businessman and leader of the free world is one of constant failure. And the part that troubles me most is he seems content with himself. He will leave office with the country $10 trillion in debt, fighting two wars, our international reputation in shambles, our government cloaked in secrecy and suspicion that his entire presidency has been a litany of broken laws and promises, our citizens' faith in our own country ripped to shreds. Yet Bush goes bumbling along, grinning and spewing moronic one-liners, as though nobody understands what a colossal failure he has been. I fear to the depth of my being that John McCain is just like him,"
- Jack Cafferty, CNN.

What Jack doesn't mention here is that he has admitted in the past to voting for Bush. Twice. Both in 2000 and 2004.

At least he has it right now.

The Answer is ... Wa-wa.

2008-08-16T06:29:00.006-05:00

“Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.”

"At the age of 20, we don't care what the world thinks of us; at 30, we worry about what it is thinking of us; at 40, we discover that it wasn't thinking of us at all.”

“At 20 years of age the will reigns; at 30 the wit; at 40 the judgement.”

“Forty is the old age of youth; fifty is the youth of old age.”

“To me, old age is always fifteen years older than I am.”

***

Today is my friend Frenchy's 40th birthday. Today also is Madonna's 50th birthday. Shout-outs to both, and to my friend Peaches, who turned 40 earlier this week.

Were we ever young? Wa-wa.

Happy Birthday!

(Quote source, from the likes of Victor Hugo and Ben Franklin, here.)

"I Just Shook His Hand"

2008-08-15T20:57:00.005-05:00

As in Ernest Borgnine's hand, which just might be calloused. The 'splanation here:

Speaking of Ernest Borgnine, although he earned an Oscar for Marty in 1955, and he was quite good in this, my all-time favorite Borgnine role is "Rogo" in The Poseidon Adventure, as in Det. Lt. Mike Rogo.

I wish I had a cool name like Rogo.

Bigfoot: Rest In Peace, My Furry Friend

2008-08-14T18:58:00.008-05:00

The email came from Wally mid-day. Big Foot is dead!

In fact, two men who are holding a press conference tomorrow say they've found Bigfoot dead in the hills of George.

I just hope that the big lug finally is in a better place!

I wonder if Steve Austin or Jaime Sommers were in on the hunt for Sasquatch?

This Day in 2004

2008-08-14T18:54:00.006-05:00

Aug. 14, 2004. I was enjoying a fabulous week in Provincetown while "soon-to-be President" John Kerry was riding high in the polls. This is the way the presidential race looked on this day.

Of course, this was before T. Boone Pickens swiftboated John Kerry's biggest strength (war hero) into a faux weakness thanks to enough media-aided hot air to power several T. Boone windfarms.

(Graphic Source: the always enlightening electoral-vote.com)

Things I've Been Meaning to Blog About

2008-08-12T07:20:00.006-05:00

* Morgan Freeman drives a 1997 Nissan Maxima?

* Madonna and Neil Diamond both have new CDs, both of which are on my Ipod, and both are playing four nights at Madison Square Garden, and both are selling out their world tours. Don't ask me what I think this means.

* Libra from Big Brother 10 on CBS reminds me of Michelle Obama. Minus the class, charm, intelligence and grace.

* John Edwards is a fool. A fool with a haircut and a 50,000-square-foot house.

UPDATE: Uh, nevermind what I said about Libra, who was voted off the show last night and whose family (profiled on last night's show) seems like an utterly decent lot. Unlike other contestants, who are on the verge of tears after they get voted out as they wallow in self-absorbtion, with a look on their faces as if another 9/11 just happened, she handled her exit interview with Julie Chen with ... class, charm, intelligence and grace. Seriously.

Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs

2008-08-03T09:14:00.004-05:00

Tom Brokaw on Meet the Press: Do you think running a campaign ad in which you feature Britney Spears and Paris Hilton is respectful of Barack Obama?

Joe Lieberman: [Perks up his head, raises his eyebrows and announces confidently and seemingly with utter sincerity] I do.

I Wonder if Sherwin Williams Ever Runs Out of Paint?

2008-07-27T18:07:00.001-05:00

Saturday afternoon I ordered a medium house coffee at the Starbucks inside the local Target.

"We are all out of coffee. Can you wait?"

I went home and brewed my own.

Sunday morning, at a different Starbucks, Wally and I ordered two large coffees in the drive-through window.

"We are out of coffee," so you'll have to pull around and we'll bring it out to you.

So we pulled around, waited more than 10 minutes and then walked inside to pick up the coffee.

***

IN RELATED NEWS:

Starbucks stock price two years ago: $34.03.
Starbucks stock price on Friday: $14.42.

Make it Stop!

2008-07-26T11:30:00.003-05:00

I can't get the Activia jingle out of my head.

My Middle Finger Had to Issue a Retraction

2008-07-25T06:29:00.001-05:00

Busy road on a rainy day. 5:15 in the p.m. Rush hour. Traffic.

The idiot in the fancy red car flying the American flag almost runs me off the road. Stressful day at work and now this? Fuck. I coulda been kilt!

He pulls away. I notice the driver is talking on a cell phone. Of course. Whenever anybody is driving like an idiot it usually turns out he (or she) is on his cell phone.

What am I to do? How can I let off some steam? Road rage, clearly, is the answer. So I flip him off. Subtly.

I approach closer. My one-finger wave, mostly hidden, is more for me than for him, but then I notice it. On his back window. The sticker -- an Obama 08 sticker.

My middle finger quickly issues a retraction.

He's probably having a bad day, too, I think, and I bet that's an important call.

Keep hope alive.

25 Years Ago in Baseball

2008-07-24T07:41:00.002-05:00

1. Players wore tighter uniforms.

2. The moustache was not just a matter of grooming: It was a personal statement.

3. The infamous George Brett Pine Tar incident -- 25 years ago TODAY.

Two Unrelated Facts to Stew On

2008-07-23T18:20:00.008-05:00

1. Jerry from Big Brother 10, currently airing on CBS, is 75 years old -- the token old guy on the show amidst all the "youngens."

2. If John McCain wins the presidency, he will be as old as Jer-Bear by the time he is about halfway through his presidency.

I don't know what any of this means or adds up to, but it makes me ... kind of nervous.

Keep hope alive.

Do the Math

2008-07-18T07:26:00.002-05:00

Stephen Colbert + Canadian Rockers = ENTERTAINMENT.

This was the rock trio Rush's first appearance on U.S. TV in 30 years.

You Got That Right

2008-07-17T07:22:00.000-05:00

I *heart* Jaclyn Smith.

The Gospel According to Corey Worthington: Love Yourself!

2008-07-16T12:13:00.003-05:00

How could anybody possibly disagree?

Party on, Garth!

Spicoli!

But Does It Have an Opposable Thumb?

2008-07-16T05:45:00.000-05:00

Why I like 'Flipping Out'

2008-07-15T05:24:00.004-05:00

A friend of mine won't watch the show Flipping Out (new episode airs tonight on Bravo) because he says it makes him nervous watching Jeff Lewis' obsessive-compulsive disorder.

This is why I like the show. Don't we all know someone just a little bit like Jeff Lewis?

The reality genre itself is more "fake" than "real" -- chock full of producer-created drama and shallow dramatics involving narcissistic fame-seekers playing to the camera in the hopes of becoming "a star."

My sense is that although these qualities are present to some extent on Flipping Out, viewers nevertheless see an accurate portrait of the main subject.

Why? Because I suspect that the needless drama and conflict Lewis fosters on the show would be happening regardless of whether the camera was rolling. Lewis really is as he appears on his reality TV show. The camera is capturing his quirks, his personality, his disorders.

I find this interesting. It's like real "reality-like" reality TV. For a change. Think about that when some intentionally-bad phony gets air time on America's Got Talent or American Idol or some "houseguest" quite purposefully goes into Hyper-Bitch mode on Big Brother just to stoke up their own air time.

Guess What's New on DVD?

2008-07-14T05:16:00.000-05:00

Square Pegs, Square Pegs, Square ... Pegs.

More here.

Opening credits below:

From the first episode:

Two Things That Disturb Me

2008-07-13T05:18:00.006-05:00

As of the the past year or so, I am now:

* Older than Homer Simpson. He's eternally 39.

* I'm really not that much younger than Hugh Beaumont was when he started on Leave it to Beaver.

Was I ever young?

UPDATE: I was carded buying alcohol this weekend at Trader Joe's by a clerk who couldn't have been more than 22. He was wearing glasses.