Facebook Status Updates I'd Like to See (But Probably Won't)

INSERT NAME HERE has explosive diarrhea.

INSERT NAME HERE is pleasuring himself.

INSERT NAME HERE is pleasuring herself.

INSERT NAME HERE is taking the Activia 14-day Challenge.

INSERT NAME HERE is using too many exclamation points!!!!

INSERT NAME HERE became a fan of rectal thermometers.

INSERT NAME HERE has her panties in a bunch.

INSERT NAME HERE has his panties in a bunch.

INSERT NAME HERE became a fan of Incomplete Sentences.

INSERT NAME HERE became a fan of Becoming a Fan of Things.

INSERT NAME HERE can't spell, punctuate or communicate.

Miscellaneous Facebook Ruminations

Are people with more than one ga-zillion Facebook friends really popular or really superficial?

I didn't like you in high school. Why would I want to be your Facebook friend now?

Farm World. I hope there's a level where at some point players, somehow, and in some way, are able to "get a life."

Meow!

Gotta run, cuz I got something cookin' in Cafe World (limited menu: toast and bacon) and I'm eligible for a Farkle bonus game in exactly 37 minutes.