Tiger Woods, Jimmy Stewart and Bob Hope

... All on the same set, for a taping of the Mike Douglas Show, when Tiger Woods was 2 years old. Watch below:



I love YouTube!

PETS: People for the Ethical Treatment of Soldiers

Rosie O'Donnell, on the tainted pet food that has been pulled from shelves, this morning, on The View:

This has been all over the news. It really started on March 16. And since then, 15 cats and one dog have died, and it's been all over the news. And you know, since that date, 29 soldiers have died. [pause]. And we haven't heard much about them.

... I just think it's interesting that so much news coverage is about the kitties.

The Future of Live Theater?

Sunday afternoon I went to see some live theater, my third play in four days: a drama (but also funny) with a strong script that was nicely acted by the leads. There were maybe 12 paid members in the audience. And it was a show worthy of an audience. And of these three shows -- two plays and one musical -- I would put the average age of the audience members at probably 50-something.

Twelve people in the audience for a well-done show with a thoughtful script? Even a really horrible YouTube video can get 12 accidental and undeserved views.

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Speaking of YouTube, the below video is a work of theater that as of this morning has gotten 1,803,958 views. One thing is for sure: You don't have any script problems for this classic work, a delightful rendering of Hamlet using cat heads.

How YouTube Is Shaping A New Kind of TV

If you like parodies, you may want to check out the new show on VH1 called Acceptable TV. Each week they have five mini TV show pilots. Viewers vote on their favorites: Two shows get renewed, and three get canceled. You can watch the five mini pilots here.

This week's pilots include a James Bond spoof called Homeless James Bond; a short called Joke Chasers that draws inspiration from those God-awful Ghost-hunting shows that my friend Bobby M and my LUH-ver Wally seem to live for; and a game show called Who Farted? that parodies Deal or No Deal by crossing it with any number of other of the new breed of game shows, such as Identity.

I think my favorite might have been The Teensies, a short inspired by the old cartoon The Littles, about a miniature family that lives with some potheads.

Voting ends today.

With the advent of YouTube and DVR's, the whole economic model of TV is changing, and this show -- which features a built in advertising sponsor -- is a recognition of this fact.

B.W.I.: Blogging While Intoxicated

2:24 a.m.

Tonight (or was that last night?) was my FINAL St. Pat's Day party of 2007, concluding three straight weekends of parties put on by people whose names included Shane and Seamus; Meghan and Miles; Patrick and Peaches.

I love you guys!

My Five Favorite Musicals

1. Les Miserables.

2. 1776.

3. Cabaret.

4. La Cage aux Folles

5. A Chorus Line

(Just missing the cut: Big River, Chicago, Gypsy)

To My Readers: You Complete Me

Stephen Colbert Interviews Katie Couric

Colbert: Given the range of things that you have to deal with, what do you think prepared you most for the anchor's chair: Was it being a cheerleader or a sorority sister?

Couric: Ouch.


Colbert: When you left The Today Show, you broke a lot of hearts. ... But when you left, you said, and I like this: "After listening to my heart and my gut, two things that have served me pretty well in the past, I will be leaving today." I want to thank you for not using your brain when you made that decision, just going with your heart and your gut.

Couric: I decided to follow your lead.

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What We Really Learned On 'Lost' Last Night

Glass windows in luxury high-rise apartment buildings break as easily as egg shells.

Now, I expect glass to break this easily if we're talking about the front windshield of Johnboy's truck on The Waltons, but not so much for anything else.







Speaking of Lost, have you noticed a remarkable character trait of John Locke, the guy who is falling in the above photos?

He's a liar. He does it often, and easily.

In the last two episodes he has lied, point blank, to several people on the island; to two police detectives in a flashback scene; and to the rich kid who came knocking at his door (also during a flashback scene).

This liar has been shattering the truth almost every time he opens his mouth, which is interesting since he also appears to be the character who has found a sort of spiritual peace since the crash. Regular viewers equate John Locke with being a good man, a very good man, but he sure does like to tell lies.

He's just like ... The Others?

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Check out this clip from Season 1 of Lost, in which you see (in the background) a man falling from a building.

Is that John Locke falling?

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Calvert "Larry Bud Melman" DeForest: 1921-2007

I hope that St. Peter himself was at the Pearly Gates to greet Mr. DeForest, possibly dressed as a bear and personally handing Mr. DeForest a nice hot towel.

The Town Crier

Here's my prescription for the little girl who kept crying last night on American Idol, a girl who just coincidentally was placed near the front of the studio and in a camera-friendly seat, almost as if it had been planned by producers!:

1. Daily use of Celexa, 20 mg.

2. A hug, and an "I love you sweetie" from her parents.

3. Acting lessons, and quite possibly an agent.

***

God bless this emotional little girl! But if the producers used her as a TV stunt -- something she could face ridicule for for a long time coming -- then shame on them.

No hugs for American Idol producers!

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Hold The Gravy

The makers of "Special Kitty Select Cuts," a cat food that sounds like it uses better meat than a McDonald's hamburger, are being sued in a wrongful death lawsuit. The Chicago Tribune has a story this morning, as does the Sun-Times.

The pet food recall mentioned in these stories includes 40 brands of cat food and 51 brands of dog food sold by companies such as Iams, PetCare and Science Diet.

The USDA says that at least 14 animals -- one dog and 13 cats -- have died after eating pet food products made by Menu Foods. The culprit: tainted gravy.

Routine tasting trials led to the recall of the products:

During quarterly taste tests, the company fed its products to 25 cats and 15 dogs, and of those, nine cats died, Sundlof said. The company said four cats and one dog belonging to customers died also, he said.

Sundlof said he fears the number of animals affected is widespread.

The Chicago cat that died, by the way, looked a lot like Morris the Cat.

Letterman Calls In Sick

David Letterman called in sick last night to The Late Show after eating a can of Special Kitty Select Cuts, according to an unfounded and false Internet rumor created earlier in this sentence by the website The Cup of Joe.

No word yet from Letterman's spokesperson about why he may have been eating the gourmet cat food.

Sandler, by the way, did a nice job filling in. Above, he is interviewing his dog, Matzoball, who thankfully does not appear to eat dog food meatballs with a tainted gravy complement.

Sandler said Letterman, who had been complaining for weeks about how he's been under the weather since Christmas, had the flu.

Here's hoping Dave gets better soon.

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The Love Song From Oliver! About A Murderer

Melinda Doolittle just finished singing "As Long As He Needs Me" on American Idol. It's a song from the musical Oliver!

A little background about the song: Within the context of Oliver! it's sung by the character of Nancy, and she's singing about her boyfriend ... a violent criminal named Bill Sykes who physically abuses Nancy and, by the end of show, clubs her to death.

That said, it's a beautiful song about a very ugly relationship based on undeserved female loyalty and co-dependence. (Read the song lyrics here.) I've heard it sung many times before, by various actresses, and I really LOVED what Doolittle did with it.

She's in a totally different class than most of the other remaining 10 contestants, don't you think?

Dave Has Questions For Paula

Oprah Winfrey says that when you interview someone, always ask the questions you really want the answers to.

David Letterman, who is a much better interviewer than people give him credit for, asked Paula Abdul three questions last night on The Late Show that would have made Oprah proud:

1. Did you have sex with that kid on the show?

2. What about the reports that you were drinking on the show?

3. Have you ever taken any pain medication or any kind of prescription drugs that make you seem incoherent or fuzzy?

However, in the clip that CBS uploaded to YouTube, you won't hear him asking these questions, and you'll only hear Paula answering, sort of, a related question that was phrased slightly differently.

Below is an edited portion of the interview, which was in no way contentious. (Dave told Paula he is a big fan of American Idol.) Paula's answers to the above questions (paraphrased by me) were:

1) No.
2) I don't drink and have never been drunk.
3) No.

When Movies Become Musicals

Edward Scissorhands, the musical/dance spectacular based on the 1990 Johnny Depp/Tim Burton movie, just opened in New York at the Brooklyn Academy of Music. Here's the New York Times review from today.

I was a little more fond of the show than the critic. And I liked it a lot better than I was expecting, especially since I hate the trend of Broadway in recent years to remake movies, such as Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, The Wedding Singer and Urban Cowboy: The Musical. Coming next: Legally Blonde, which opens in previews on April 3.

Urban Cowboy ran on broadway for only 60 regular performances, and I was at one of them. It's the worst musical I've ever seen.

See below for the ONE musical based on a movie I'd really like to see.

'A Devastating Portrait'

It doesn't take a genius to figure out that if you're trying to solve a problem, you need to ask the people closest to the problem what they think.

Which is exactly what ABC News did.

From ABC News.com: "A new national survey paints a devastating portrait of life in Iraq: widespread violence, torn lives, displaced families, emotional damage, collapsing services, an ever starker sectarian chasm — and a draining away of the underlying optimism that once prevailed."

Full story here.

When you read the ABC News story, substitute the word "America" or "Americans" every time you see the word "Iraq" or "Iraqis." Better yet, put in the name of your city or state.

Imagine living how the article describes. For Americans, it is ... unimaginable.