Think About This Closely

Antonella Barba, the cutie pie American Idol contestant known for both her skimpy internet photos and for having about 20 percent of Kelly Clarkson's vocal talents, is now the Number One searched phrase on Technorati. It's been that way for days, since she was voted off the show last week.

Also in the Top 10: Gay porn star/marine/conservative icon Matt Sanchez and singer Clay Aiken.

This might say something about American culture ... but I'm not sure what.

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An Enigma Wrapped in a Riddle

During the summer of 2005, straight guy Bruce Heffernan pondered a puzzlesome question in a widely circulated and cited "think-piece" that first appeared in the pages of The Onion: "Why Do All These Homosexuals Keep Sucking My Cock?"

Look, I'm not a hateful person or anything—I believe we should all live and let live. But lately, I've been having a real problem with these homosexuals. You see, just about wherever I go these days, one of them approaches me and starts sucking my cock.

Take last Sunday, for instance, when I casually struck up a conversation with this guy in the health-club locker room. Nothing fruity, just a couple of fellas talking about their workout routines while enjoying a nice hot shower. The guy looked like a real man's man, too—big biceps, meaty thighs, thick neck. He didn't seem the least bit gay. At least not until he started sucking my cock, that is.

Where does this queer get the nerve to suck my cock? Did I look gay to him? Was I wearing a pink feather boa without realizing it? I don't recall the phrase, "Suck my cock" entering the conversation, and I don't have a sign around my neck that reads, "Please, You Homosexuals, Suck My Cock."

I've got nothing against homosexuals. Let them be free to do their gay thing in peace, I say. But when they start sucking my cock, I've got a real problem.

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Matt Sanchez, the U.S. marine and FOB (Friend of Bill O'Reilly) who has a gay porn past, is apparently now saying that he's not gay, that he doesn't like gay sex and that the same holds true for ... all the men he's slept with.

LINK.

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Sean Hannity and the Gay Porn Star

"You're a great American, thank you for your service to your country," Sean Hannity told ex-Marine Matt Sanchez on his Fox TV show recently, after Sanchez won the Jean Kirkpatrick Academic Freedom Award from a conservative group.

Well, it turns out that Matt Sanchez was giving service to more than just his country.

Sanchez is a former gay porn star and prostitute, something that Hannity and Bill O'Reilly probably didn't know when they were performing analingus (kissing his ass) on their shows the other day. Conservative harpies Ann Coulter and Michelle Malkin probably didn't know it either, when they posed for pictures with him.

If you want the full story connecting this gay porn star with Coulter, Hannity and O'Reilly, you can watch an MSNBC report in full below.

Or you can read about it here and here.

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My only complaint about the Olbermann report is that they could have had a gay blogger on to interview for the show -- one of whom I link to above -- but producers decided to interview on-camera a straight guy from Media Matters who found out about the stories by reading ... gay bloggers like Joe. My. God. It's sort of like having someone from the New York Times on to talk about a story first broke by NPR and other radio outlets. Why not go "straight" to the gay source?

If I were the segment producer for this story, I would have interviewed JMG for this report, if only because of his totally cool first name.



UPDATE: It also turns out that Sanchez used to date prominent gay blogger Andy Towle from Towleroad. LINK.

UPDATE TWO: Sanchez gives his side of the story to Salon. JMG gives an update, too.