Leaving No Child Behind Without Body Lice

Sometimes even the best-intentioned things -- and even some ill-intentioned things -- can have interesting, and harmful, consequences. For example, the Bush Administration's Clear Skies Act actually makes things easier for polluters.

A front-page story in yesterday's Wall Street Journal demonstrates that even though George Bush has record low poll numbers, he is actually enjoying record-high popularity with blood-sucking body lice.

The story, "Kink in Federal Law Is Prompting Schools to Stop Picking Nits," explains how the No Child Left Behind Law benefits the critters:

Schools use to take a hard line on the sesame-seed-sized parasites, which suck human blood and glue their eggs to individual hairs. At the first sign of an outbreak, pupils got scalp checks. Those with lice were immediately banished from the classroom until all lice and eggs -- known as nits -- were gone.

But to the dismay of many parents, these "no nits" policies are disappearing as school districts face state and federal pressure to reduce absenteeism and boost academic achievement.

I have only one comment on this whole matter. George Bush is soft on body lice!