Car Chase + Cat Collector = Cuckoo

This is bizzare: A man well-known as a cat collector led police on a high speed chase in Texas that reached 100 miles an hour. He claimed he was trying to get a sick cat to the hospital before it died.

It also appears as if the cat already had been dead for a long time.

"My cat was dying. I'm trying to get him to the vet," said the man. "I was trying to get to the vet, and I was hoping they would just quit following me."

Watch and read more here.

If You've Been 'Baking Up a Batch of Frownies' ...

Then watch this:



Coming Soon: My "five favorite moments in The Simpsons Movie." Feel free to share yours in the comments.

There Are 2131 Reasons He's In The Hall of Fame

Baseball “Iron Man”Cal Ripken – who played in a record 2130 consecutive games, a record that probably will never be broken --was inducted into the Hall of Fame today, gaining 98.5 percent of the vote.

This means that 1.5 percent of the 545 voters did not for Cal.

Here’s my suspected explanation for why these 8 people did not select Ripken on the first ballot:

• 3 of the 8 were under the influence of various prescription and “non prescription” medications.
• 1 of the 8 have never watched Ripken play.
• 4 of the 8 … are clinically insane.

Tony Gwynn also was inducted yesterday to the Hall of Fame, aother choice that should have been unanimous. Thirteen baseball writers failed to vote for him.

Cuckoo. Cuckoo. Cuckoo.

Quote of the Night

“I’m speechless,” Kail told America on Big Brother 8 tonight, beaming over the fact that she was not evicted from the house. “Prayer does work. Oh my goodness. Whew!”

As I mentioned in a previous post, it’s now time for Kail to start praying for an end to childhood hunger, an abundance of clean water around the world, and cures for all types of cancer.

Quote of the Day

“Basically, [Barry] Bonds has about the same work as some flight attendants – three days on, two days off – and without the duty to be friendly.”

-- Selena Roberts, in today’s New York Times

Kail and Paula Want Help From God

Tonight, on Big Brother 8, we'll find out whether Kail will be evicted from the house. Who is Kail? She is the Christian contestant who is lying about her wealth and hiding the fact that she owns several businesses. She also has expressed horror, on national TV, at the thought of having a gay or lesbian son or daughter.

On Tuesday night, Kail told America via the confessional that whether she gets evicted tonight is NOT in the hands of Dick, the guy who nominated her for eviction. Rather, she told the camera, it's in the hands of God.

So let me get this straight: God has done nothing to stop the War in Iraq or any of the horrible ethnic and religous conflicts that permeate the globe, but She or He does definitely have a plan in store for whether Kail gets evicted?

Sigh.

Amber from Big Brother 8 also has expressed similar reliance on God, and she thinks God is profoundly concerned with whether she gets evicted from the house.

Sigh.

***

Also this week, we here at The Cup of Joe watched Hey Paula on Bravo for the first time.

Let's put Paula's life in perspective. She is stinking rich and lives a life of luxury, with personal assistants for wardrobe, scheduling, hair, etc, but feels the need to break out in tears seemingly every 15 minutes or so, because of how overworked she is. Or how people mistreat her. Take note that while she is having a breakdown, her assistants don't seem to react much. They must be used to it.

On the last episode I watched, Paula described "the most hideous experience for me to could go through." It didn't involve starvation, war, terrorism, or cancer.

"I wonder, where's God when you need him (voice cracking) ... because this just does not any sense," she told the camera.

So what was this horrifying thing that happened to her? You can watch the video below and find out. It's not about losing a limb, contracting the flesh-eating bacteria, or death by slow torture, all of which are "hideous experiences."



More background here. Other sources frame Paula's hideous/horrifying experience in a much different light.

UPDATE:

Kail was not evicted from the Big Brother House last night. Instead, Mike "the painting contractor who's really a model" was evicted.

God must be answering Kail's prayers, which is why I wish that she'll start praying for an end to the War in Iraq and a cure for cancer.

Can This Cat Predict Death?

YOU make the call by reading this.

A Quick Thought on the Harry Potter Finale

Think there's two more Harry Potter films?

Well, let me be the first to suggest (and start the rumor) that you are wrong. Having just completed the last book, I think there could be a chance that they'll make two movies out of the final book.

By the way,I thought the finish to the book was OUTSTANDING.

But will the producers, in a magical quest for more profits, turn the final book into two movies? Does such a quest enchant you?

And did you like the finish as much as I did?

Quote of the Day

A certain character says on page 718 of the new Harry Potter book: "... perhaps those that are best suited to power are those who have never sought it. Those who, like you, have leadership thrust upon them, and take up the mantle because they must, and find to their own surprise that they wear it well."

Think about this next time you watch a presidential debate, as you listen to those men and women whose ambitions flow, I think, from their narcissism.

I mean, who in his or her right mind could really think no one else could be a better president?

Cuckoo.

Oh Jesus

Which character in the Harry Potter books does this woman remind you of?



I'd recommend she take a nice literature class in which words like symbolism and allegory are clearly, clearly explained. It might even help her understand some of the New Testament stories better.

This is my last post until Tuesday night. By then, I should have finished the last Harry Potter book ... even though I haven't read any of the previous six. I'm on page 476 now. You know, just after that *really sad thing* happens!

President Dick Cheney: What's On His To-Do List?

He'll be the man "officially" in charge for three hours or so this morning, while President Bush gets his colonoscopy, thanks to section 3 of the 25th amendment.

First on the agenda, I think Cheney should issue an executive order legalizing the right for his lesbian daughter to marry.

Do it for your new granddaughter, OK Dick?

Next up, he can take the first steps to remove U.S. troops from the Iraq disaster.

Do it for your country, OK Dick?

(IT'S YOUR TURN: Please fill in the blanks in the comments!)

After that, he can _________________________.

Do it for your _________________, OK Dick?

Emmy Nominations: The Schrute Buck Stops Here

Last September I wrote a post, "Great Buffoons in TV history," and mentioned that Rainn Wilson deserved an Emmy nomination for his work as Dwight Schrute on The Office.

So we are happy to note the good news that Wilson was nominated for an Emmy yesterday as best supporting actor in a comedy show.

Someone gives this guy a couple Schrute bucks -- and the Emmy.

***

Other miscellaneous Emmy notes:

* Kathy Griffin was nominated for best reality TV series for My Life on the D List. She's competing against Antiques Roadshow, which makes me laugh.
* A hilarious episode of The Office, "The Gay Witch Hunt," was nominated for outstanding writing and direction.
* Scrubs "My Musical," one of the best single episodes of TV comedy I think I've ever seen in any year, also was nominated for outstanding direction, as was the superb season finale of Lost.
* Ricky Gervais as Andy Millman (Extras) and Alec Baldwin as Jack Donaghy (30 Rock) both were nominated for outstanding lead actor in a comedy series. (Without even mentioning the other great nominees, what a choice! I'd opt for Baldwin.)
* Both Michael Emerson as Ben and Terry O'Quinn as John Locke were nominated for outstanding supporting actor for Lost. But wherefore art thou Juliet?
* Top Chef and Project Runway both were nominated for outstanding reality-competition series. I'd give Runway the nod as Top Chef lost some flavor in its second season. Top Chef, while still entertaining and still on my Tivo, has become once extended product placement/commercial.
* If you look at all the variety nominations, you don't see Jay Leno much, eh? David Letterman once again was deservedly nominated for outstanding individual performance in a variety or music program; outstanding writing; and outstanding variety, music or comedy series. No Jay in any of these three categories.

Looks like the Dancing Itos can't save Jay this time.

Morning Question

Gays love, love, love The Bionic Woman. This is common knowledge. Here's my earlier post on this.

So in the new version airing on NBC this fall, why in the world would the network cast homophobe Isaiah Washington?

Buzz + Kill = Buzzkill. LINK

Coming Later Today: Emmy Nominations

In about 25 minutes Emmy nominations will be announced. Look for my thoughts later today.

It will be particularly interesting to see which actors from Lost get nominated. I hope that the characters of Locke, Ben, Juliet and Charlie are among the mix. Especially Juliet, played by Elizabeth Mitchell.

And if Lost isn't nominated for best dramatic series, for the second year in a row, we here at The Cup of Joe will be very disappointed.

VIKI Lives!

After the post yesterday morning, a reader emailed that Tiffany Brissette, 32, who played VIKI the robot on "Small Wonder," has a full page photo in the latest Details magazine and is working as a nurse in Boulder, Colo. There's her current photo at right. Here is the source.

At that link you also can learn whatever happened to other child stars, including those from Webster, Growing Pains, The Wonder Years, Full House, The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and Who's the Boss.

A Peek Into the Future?

"In the Year 2000: George Bush will no longer be referred to as America's dumbest president, but rather as America's most successful retard."
-- Conan O'Brien

Happy Days For Fall TV

COMING THIS FALL: the great Norman Lear is producing a one-hour TV show for NBC, and the great Jerry Seinfeld is returning to a network TV comedy show.

Read more here.

And in what sounds like a truly awful idea, the tired (and previously canceled) reality show The Apprentice (which became a parody of itself with all its product placement plugs happily shilled by annoyingly obsequious contestants who couldn't opine enough glowing comments about "Mr. Trump," who is, by the way, "amazing") will be returning with ... a celebrity cast?

I need your help in the comments. I'm accepting nominations for washed up celebrity contestants to appear with Donald Trump on the celebrity version of The Apprentice. Let me start by throwing out VIKI the robot from Small Wonder and Potsie from Happy Days.

Potsie and Viki, you're hired!